Something wise(-ish)

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If you listen to the show, then you’ve probably gathered that I’m pretty high on ambition.
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I love when our listeners chase their goals, fight for their dreams, and find the success they crave.

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This is one of the reasons we’re here on earth — to play, to grow, to achieve.
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But I also love when our listeners lead with other values.

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To build great relationships that aren’t just about advancement and productivity.
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To enjoy their hobbies without trying to turn them into side hustles, competitions or careers.

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To create experiences that are fun and fulfilling for their own sake.

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So it’s not like ambition is the only quality worth pursuing.
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I get just as excited about listeners who say, “I work 40 hours a week and make less than I could, but I spend my nights and weekends with my partner/kids/family/friends and take awesome trips and read great books because that’s what gives my life meaning.”

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We’re not all wired to achieve at the highest levels.
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We’re not all obligated to prioritize ambition.
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And those of us who are ambitious still need experiences that aren’t about achievement.
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But if you don’t feel ambitious, I would still unpack that quality.​
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Because sure — you might just not value making a ton of money or acquiring power or taking on a ton of obligations.

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But it’s also possible that you’re avoiding something by not being in touch with your ambition.

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Responsibility.
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Expectations.
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Contact with other people.

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Conflict with other people.
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The pressure of taking your strengths seriously.

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The intensity of investing in your skills, your mindsets, your desires.

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The fear of confronting your limitations, making mistakes, having to grow.
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So if you’re one of those people who say, “Eh, I’m just not ambitious,” I’d invite you to dig a little deeper.​
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You’re absolutely allowed to not be type A. It’s totally fine to strive for happiness over achievement.

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But whenever we have a strong stance — especially about ourselves — it’s usually protecting something underneath the surface.
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And if you’re going to live a life that isn’t ambitious in some area — work, family, art, or just being an interesting person — I want you to be sure that it’s for the right reasons.
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Not because you’re trying to avoid the wrong ones.
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And if you want to hear how this idea played out in a listener’s life…

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Check out episode #910, where we took a question from a talented attorney who was actively fighting against being promoted at his company.

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His story brought to life a fascinating question — whether it’s okay to prioritize freedom and joy and remain unambitious, even when you’re super talented.
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We also explored what else might be underlying this listener’s resistance to rising up, and how we can unpack our true motivations for wanting to stay exactly where we are.

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Have you found this principle to be true in your world? Struggling to make use of it?​
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Hit reply and tell me about it. I’m all ears!

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On the show this past week

​1054: Renee DiResta | The Puppet Masters of Public Opinion​

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​1055: Is Nephew Forever Lost for Denying Holocaust? | Feedback Friday​

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​1056: Placebo & Nocebo Effects | Skeptical Sunday​

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